How often do you forget to count your successes and focus on your achievement?
Do you downright negate them as if they were inconsequential?
Do you ever feel that you are not good enough?
“I only lost 10 lbs!” is an expression I can’t tell you how many times I’ve heard...
There is always an emphasis on the word '‘ONLY”.
Why can’t we feel exuberant about our successes ?
Wouldn’t it be wonderful if you could shout out to the world, “I’ve lost 10 lbs!” with a tone of gratitude, joy, and positive expectancy for more of the same (if more is needed), instead of hanging your head in shame?
Somehow we believe that if we keep raising the bar higher and downplay what we have already accomplished, it will cause us to achieve more, faster.
But instead,
The opposite is true. We end up feeling discouraged as if nothing is good enough, and often these sentiments cause us to give up.
why It's important to count your successes: success breeds success
Have you ever heard the expression, success breeds success?
If you are unsure if that’s true, take some time to focus on your positive outcomes,
instead of keeping the spotlight on your missteps.
Yes, it’s good to review all of our actions in order to learn from them and to set higher standards for ourselves.
However,
When you are not count your successes you berate yourself for every error, your are stifling your own ability to create something new. The reason why is by giving so much attention to the mistake, you are magnifying its impact and draining your own energy.
That’s right—we are draining our own energy.
As a biofeedback therapist, I have had the privilege of experiencing how our thoughts impact our physical body.
When a client is hooked up to a biofeedback unit that measures the autonomic nervous system, we can see that when he focuses on something he feels good about, his brain wave frequency changes from Beta (thinking, worrying, strong emotional reactions) to the more relaxed, creative, slower, healing levels of Alpha and Theta.
We are made up of energy... When we are fretting, obsessing, judging, and condemning (ourselves or anyone else) we are not in a creative, solution-oriented state of mind.
Rather, our attention becomes more and more narrow and our choices are fewer and less creative.
We may feel boxed in, trapped, or constricted.
when you are not counting your successes, All-access to your own creative life force is blocked.
Do You Feel Drained?
When we use the expression, “I feel drained,” it’s because we literally are drained of our vitality! All-access to our own creative life force is blocked.
However,
When we open our awareness and go beyond the outcome of the “mistake,” we have the opportunity to learn, grow, and make positive changes.
Once you start to count your successes yur energy literally shifts. New possibilities and new opportunities present themselves to you.
It’s not easy to remove ourselves from the throes of despair when we feel let down either by ourselves or someone else.
We can’t “get rid of” the feeling of emotional pain that we experience at that time.
Perhaps you are genuinely upset that in three months' time, after the initial weight loss of 10 lbs, your weight doesn’t seem to be budging, despite your sincere efforts.
What I am suggesting is that you:
Take time to count your successes and send yourself compassion for the situation that you are in rather than make it worse by hammering yourself.
It can be very helpful to remind yourself that you are controlling what you do have control over (the foods that go into your mouth and how much activity you are doing), and that some things are not in your control (how fast the weight comes off).
If you were driving from New York to Los Angeles and got stuck in a huge traffic jam in Colorado, would you just give up and turn around?
Chances are you would take a deep breath and accept that the pace you are now going at is slower than the one you had anticipated, but all is still well.
don’t give up on your aspirations
When your goals get intercepted by life, don’t give up on your aspirations. rather, be aware of the inner voice that wants to convince you to just forget it—that it’s not possible, and instead, change your focus.
You can’t get rid of doubt, but you can focus and count your successes to build your strength, courage, and fortitude as you forge forward, believing in yourself and your ability to succeed.
Focus and count your successes, and keep a journal of your accomplishments and review it frequently.
When you look at the successes, miracles, and angels that appear in your life, take in the fact that they far outweigh your so-called failures.
Success isn’t just dropping 10 lbs—it’s all the actions that led up to that result.
Make sure to acknowledge yourself for all the healthy foods you have selected, all the junk food you’ve passed up, each time you moved your body instead of remaining dormant, every time you practiced self-hypnosis, and all the steps you’ve taken to lift your vibration to a higher level with positive thought, affirmations and intention.
Success is your new way of thinking about yourself and your world.
Success is keeping your mouth shut where you might have blurted something out or speaking up when it may have felt more comfortable and familiar to stay silent.
Success is a shift in your perspective.
Success could be learning to smile when you feel like crying if you have been prone to emotional manipulation.
Conversely, if you tend to stuff your feelings, success may be allowing yourself to cry when in the past you would have put a fake smile on your face and then drowned your pain in a couple of vodka and tonics.
Success is:
gaining awareness and not beating yourself up.
It’s feeling your feelings without necessarily acting on them impulsively.
It’s connecting to your vast, wise self through self-hypnosis, inquiry or meditation and asking for guidance from that part of you that’s greater than your thoughts and feelings.
Ultimately when you count your successe you'll start accessing your deepest wisdom, strength, and courage and taking the right action, even in the face of disappointment and adversity.
Success is trusting yourself and trusting life and knowing in every cell of your body that you are exactly who you are supposed to be and you are exactly where you are supposed to be.
As Bette Midler reminds us so beautifully, “You are the seed that in the Spring becomes the Rose.”
This was very pertinent today. My weight loss journey is really a lifetime of thinking I am fat. I self sabotage too often and forget to praise myself when I do better. My weak area is the night time eating. I need to remember to be grateful when I have a good evening and stop being angry at myself when I have a bad one, or two, or three. It is all part of my self exploration and I will get there with gratitude. Thanks, Rena.